Posts Tagged ‘Paul mcCartney’

Once he was a Beatle, now he may be just a roach: Where is the Orkin Man?

November 22, 2012

Thanksgiving is a special day in the United States, when often far-flung families come together for good company and good food. Turkey is the dish that best symbolizes that this happy day has come again.  So beloved is that tasty dish, that one might be forgiven for thinking that Puritans first fled England, not to escape the fiery stake of  the Catholic Inquisition, but to set their teeth into the flesh of an otherwise ungainly bird.

It takes the wisdom of a Liverpudlian  pop-singer to shatter our faith in the Thanksgiving gift.  Bestriding the Atlantic Ocean like a great vegetarian Colossus, Paul McCartney beetles out the message like it truly is:

Any American who eats turkey on Turkey Day is a turkey.  President Obama, you are a turkey, for observing the tradition of issuing  presidential pardons for two such birds. Your false beneficence makes light of the  annual mass slaughter of some 46 million gentle, intelligent birds.

We all live in a meatless submarine. We should all eat meatless submarines. Stuff those submarines with yellow corn, and we are right back where we need to be: Oh! for Woodstock and the sheer joy of sex, drugs,  rock and roll, wine, women and song, and in bed before breakfast!

The drive for a meatless Thanksgiving is in full swing, and Paul McCartney is leading  PETA in its ruthless animal rights campaign. Paul McCartney, however, might care to contemplate the law of unintended consequences. For what he is rock and rolling across the Atlantic is a message of extinction for the American turkey.  Without the sacred place that they hold on all those  Thanksgiving tables,  turkeys would not be reared, lovingly as they are, would not be well- fed and cared for, would not receive the blessings of protective custody from the cradle to the dinner table.  Rather, they would be extinct.

Sad though it may be Sir Paul, the turkey is not beloved for its looks, nor for its desirability as a household pet. It is desired for its tasty flesh. As you well know, the lowly beetle was never beloved by the world’s population until it provided a product that delighted those who had no taste for classical music.

The selfish turkey gene does well to encourage those who feed on turkey at the Thanksgiving table. For all those hungry  bites sustain that selfish gene. Otherwise, turkeys might have to rely on your personal beneficence  for their survival. And the mists that roll in from the sea  may not be all that life-enhancing for  such ungainly birds, isolated on that windy Mull of Kintyre.

Happy Thanksgiving, all my readers! As you sink your teeth into delicious Thanksgiving turkey, always remember that you are helping to  save the species. Continue to do well, while doing good!

Hat Tip: ‘The war on Thanksgiving: Jibes fron the thankless shouldn’t spoil the feast’ The Washington Times, November 22, 2012


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